Blurry Cartoons

I often find myself asking, “Who am I supposed to be?” and no matter who I ask or how often I ask it, occasionally screaming it into the wind, I’ve never come any closer to an answer than simply, “Myself.” It’s not comforting, and it most certainly is not easy. That’s because it’s not an easy question, and there is no formula for how to do life “correctly.” I was very inspired by Sascha Hjort’s video titled The Most Important Question, and I highly recommend you check it out (click the blue hyperlink).

Because, as Sascha states, the question is not, “Who am I supposed to be,” but rather, “Who do I want to be?”

Life isn’t about hard, fast rules. If there was a correct way to do everything, we would just do that thing, and everything else would be incorrect deviation. I, so far, have gone through the standard stages of the American education system, achieved a bachelor’s degree in mechanical engineering, got a job as a civil engineer, a job as a barista at a coffee shop, a professional photography drone pilot (yes, 3 jobs at once), and now I’m looking at buying the coffee shop I work at, quitting the civil engineering job, and seeing what other fleeting fancy catches my dreaming eyes. In addition, I’m working on not just one, but 6 music projects simultaneously, writing stories and books, and keeping up this blog (which, if you haven’t noticed, is riddled with errors because I don’t take the time to actually edit any of the content. This is my safe place to mind-dump.

But why am I telling you this? Because this is who I want to be. And Sascha is so correct. That is the most important question (I promise that’s not a spoiler for the video, you should still watch it. She says some really great things). I am generally happy with life, though I need to add some sort of physical activity to my list of daily to-do’s, because I also want to be physically fit.

so don’t you ever dare let anyone define you

because they’ll just make a copy of themself

if, to your character, you want to stay true

blur the lines, don’t collect dust on the shelf

you’re not in a cameo roll waiting for a cue

you’re the star, you light up the sky yourself

and if you don’t like who you are in cartoon

jump off the film strip, stop trying so hard to rhyme or keep to meter or maintain a syllable count, and don’t let the question, “who do I want to be” get answered by anyone else.